Intimacy with God

What is intimacy with God? In this episode Gina has a conversation with Monika Kirkland. Monika is passionate for helping people connect in intimate relationship to God. Gina and Monika cover lots of ground in this episode touching on everything from rejection and healing, to healthy boundaries hearing God’s voice.

Monika is a wife, mom, blogger, speaker and author of Draw Near, a 4-week devotional to draw you closer to the heart of God.

Visit monikakirkland.com to get a free copy of Draw Near and learn more about Monika.

Click below to listen starting at 32:51 to follow along.

Making Space to Come Expectant Before Jesus

Gina:

Intimacy with Jesus is something we both share an affinity for, as should all. It’s easy to talk about intimacy with Jesus for some, it’s not so easy for others. The word intimacy has been hijacked by the world and some people are even just really uncomfortable with the word intimacy.

But we’re just talking about relationship. We’re talking about knowing and being known, seeing, and being seen, loving and being loved by the One who made us for said relationship. But at different stages of life, there’s different challenges to that. There’s different challenges to even knowing how to facilitate that for myself and especially it’s really cool for you as a young mom, you got a house full, to say the least.

How does that play out for you practically in the day to day of the chaos and the crazy and the dirty diapers and messy house and being the wife of a pastor and expectations there? How do you realistically find that and give yourself permission?

Monika:

For me, what I’ve discovered is that I really have a desperate need for Jesus and for time with Him. Apart from Him, all the things that I’m doing, mothering my children, writing, speaking, working, none of it is possible apart from Him. I need Him, I need to be intimate with Him. I really need His presence to sustain me, to do all those things and to do them well and to do them with mercy and grace.

Practically for me I need this, and because I need it I’m going to reorient my life in a way that makes time for it. Two things that have really helped me. One, being vocal about my need for it. Expressing to my husband, “I need some time in prayer and some time with the Lord, can I have 30 minutes?” And sometimes I’ll just go up and listen to worship music and just soak in God’s presence. Sometimes I’ll go for a walk and I’ll just do a prayer walk through my neighborhood and just talk to God.

It looks different on the day to day, I’ve had to learn to be really vocal about what I need. Not be all or nothing. I’m not in a season where I can go away on a weekend retreat and just pray and be alone and have full on silence. That sounds great for another season, but for now, even 30 minutes will really impact my life and my relationship with the Lord. Not being all or nothing, but just receiving. And God is faithful. When we give Him our little, He’ll do a lot. That’s what I found.

He’ll take a little bit of time that I present as my humble offering. He’ll work and do great things in our relationship. The other thing I realized is that even in the moments of my day when that’s not possible and I can’t sneak away, I used to think that the morning was the Holy time. I had to get up before the kids and sneak downstairs and have my quiet time.

Then God just reminded me, there’s not one part of the day, that’s holier than another part. Now I’m sweeping my floors in my kitchen or I’m doing the dishes. I’m praying the whole time, I’m worshiping. I’m constantly in communion with Him and not viewing it as separate, compartmentalized. My whole life is in fellowship with Him. He’s with me in all the doing and the working and the raising of the kids. I invite Him into every moment.

Gina:

In the two thousands there was that quiet time, it was a big. You have that special chair in your house with that corner, with your basket, with your devotionals and your books and your highlighters and your pens, and like set an alarm. There was good intention behind it, but it just creates another kind of religious exercise. Recognizing that it doesn’t have to look the same.

Part of what you are able to do that a lot of people need to start figuring out is, you know that you need 30 minutes. Not everybody can even say they need 30 minutes because they just don’t know. I would encourage people, you don’t know unless you try. Just give it a shot, find out what is that time of day where you’re exhausted.

Even this morning, I live my life on my computer, I just decided I’m going to go sit outside. And I sat outside. It was like the most beautiful day. It was literally 15 minutes with my Bible on my lap. I read two verses, the rest of the time was just breathing and just thanking God for His presence. That alone just shifts and reorients you so that you’re postured differently throughout the day.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-19 “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks… Do not quench the Spirit, do not despise prophecies…” We get so caught up in “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing.” It’s what you said, it’s doing housework and thanking God for your family, praying for your kiddos. Praying for His presence in your home, praying protection over your husband, interceding for a friend. Being in that place where you’re inviting Him into those moments.

And that is what a relationship is. It’s choosing to be in His presence, because He’s always present. But I can choose to be in His presence or not. I say often, proximity doesn’t equal presence. I can be near Him, but not with Him. What does it look like to be with Him? Even in the messy and the crazy and the ugly. He wants to be with us in all of it.

We try to keep Him in His Holy place. I ran a little bit here and there to go, “I love you.” Or, “I need this.” Or, “I can worship you on Sundays.” But He wants to be present. The veil was torn so that we could be with Him all the time. In the middle of the ugly cry or whatever’s happening.

Monika:

I love what you said about proximity doesn’t always mean presence because for me it’s so true in all of our relationships. You can be laying next to your husband in bed, but if you’re both on your phones, you’re not really in each other’s presence. You’re close to each other. You’re not together.

Gina:

That is almost an exact quote from the podcast I did with Norm on marriage. It’s true. You have to choose to engage in a relationship, and God’s already choosing to engage with us. Are we going to choose to engage with Him? Let Him in and let go of all of the formalities and just get to know Him.

I’d like to say that I know my husband, you can learn a lot about Norm on the internet. He’s Norm Stockton. He’s world famous Norm. We tease him, but you can learn that he lived in Japan, that he played bass since he was a kid, he lives in Mission Viejo, he’s married, but I know him. He walks in a room and I can tell if something’s bothering him, I can tell him if he’s in pain. We go to a restaurant, I know what he’s going to order because I know him. He’s going to ask for no tomatoes. I know him because I’ve invested that time with him.

It’s the same thing with Jesus. We were talking about prayer and intimacy, and there’s so many believers who don’t believe they can hear God’s voice or they really struggle with that. That’s a part of knowing Him when you’re intentionally seeking Him and in His presence, you start to know His voice. The Bible says “My sheep hear My voice.” The reason sheep know the voice of the Shepherd is because they’re with Him all the time, constantly. All he needs to do is grunt or whistle or say, “Hey” and they come, because they know his voice. We can know His voice too. It’s not some magic-holier-than-thou process. It’s just being with Him.

Monika:

I love that. I always tell people, “Come expectantly”. I come to my time with the Lord and I want to come expecting to hear Him, because I am His sheep and I can hear His voice. If there’s someone out there where that feels really new and foreign, start by breaking off the lie that you can’t hear from God.

Then come expectantly, arms out heart open. Ask God to open your ears and your mind to really begin to hear Him. Then trust that the more you grow in your walk with Him, the clearer and louder His voice will be in your life.

A Prayer and A Blessing

Gina:

Well, we covered a lot of ground in this conversation. But before we go, I just want to take a moment. There may have been a few things that hit you. Maybe you’re in a place where you’ve been wanting God to heal you. And you’ve been struggling with willingness to be on a journey of healing. Maybe the enemy has been accusing you and telling you that you aren’t worthy, that there’s something you’ve done or haven’t done that hindered your healing.

Right now in Jesus name, I want to break off the lie that says you’re not good enough, that you’re not worthy, that somehow God has decided that you don’t deserve to be healed. In Jesus name, I pray for the Holy Spirit, for God’s loving presence to surround you, to cover you, to comfort you, and to give you eyes to see His provision. Right here, right now in the waiting.

Maybe you could relate to Monika’s story about being rejected. About being a young girl and hearing words that were so harmful and hurtful from the people that should have been loving and encouraging and surrounding and comforting. You can relate to that rejection, those things that form us, that malform us.

In Jesus name right now, I just pray for those who are listening, who have battled with the spirit of rejection. We take authority over that spirit in Jesus’ name. We renounce the spirit of rejection. We repent from coming to agreement with those lies. Father, in Jesus’ name, would You give us the capacity to receive the truth that we are accepted in the beloved.

Lord, in Jesus name, I pray for healing. I pray for Your presence. I pray right now for supernatural capacity to discern and to see, to surrender, and to receive, to forgive. Lord, I thank you for Your sons and daughters who are reading right now. I thank you that every one of them is seen and known and loved. I thank you that You are for them, that You are above, below in front, behind, and on either side.

Your thoughts towards them outnumber the grains of sand. You delight in them. You rejoice over us with singing. Your banner over us is love. In Jesus’ name, I pray that You would give each of them gifts of Your presence, of Your voice and of Your goodness, this week. I ask all this in Jesus Name. Amen.